Hey again. I know, I know – it’s been awhile. I didn’t intend to put this off for so long, but there are benefits to having a substantial hiatus between posts; it gives me time to sit on thoughts, and accumulate a number of stories and recommendations that I can share rapid-fire (past examples here and here). This post, while lengthy, is a pretty light read, filled with memories and a few lessons learned during 2011. Enjoy!

[Click the links to jump to different sections]

• Updates
• Event Planning
• Recommendations
• San Francisco
• Dating in SF
• Facebook
• Final Thoughts

======
UPDATES
======

TEDx speech. The positive response to my 17-minute talk reaffirmed that there’s still a lot of demand for this topic, so I’ll continue to write about this stuff throughout the year. And somewhat ironically, the post I wrote about it made this the top search result for my name over the last eight months:

Recession-Proof Graduate. The 30-page ebook that the TEDx speech was based on surprisingly still has legs. Well over 100,000 people have read RPGrad in the two years that it’s been online, with next to zero push. One reader, Alessandro Agostini, was kind enough to put together an Italian translation. Another person sent me a photo of printed copies she was giving away at graduation parties. But the coolest/most bizarre story I heard was about a college professor who recommended RPGrad and the TEDx speech to his class, unaware that my younger sister was in the room. Spooky.

The 4-Hour Body. The book continues to do very well, and is still in the top 100 books on Amazon. It’s helped a ton of people improve their lives, so if you haven’t read it yet, pick up a copy. I promise you’ll find several worthwhile takeaways.

Photoshopping. I had an unflattering mention in ELLE Magazine (here). Funny, but I didn’t spend nine hours photoshopping vulvas; I’m pretty sure I gave up after one miserable hour.

Libros de mis amigos. Big congrats to Ben Casnocha and Ryan Holiday, who both have cool books coming out. Ben co-wrote his book with Reid Hoffman (the co-founder of LinkedIn and one of the most successful angel investors on the planet) and it just debuted at #1 on NYTimes. Ryan received a $500K advance for his book. Also, congrats to Michael Ellsberg on his latest book, and to Tucker Max, who is bringing his series to a close.

The 4-Hour Chef. This is Tim’s next book in the “4-Hour” series. I can’t reveal anything specific at this point, so check out what’s to come here.

Swings in Bolivia. Jeff ended up raising $11K for his project on Kickstarter, and he used the money to hang swings in Bolivia while shooting a documentary. He also gave his own TEDx talk in Sydney (you can see a preview of his documentary @ 18:44).

Travel. I had a chance to take a 10-day trip to Nairobi last June. The best part was going on a safari, which was pretty incredible (photos here). I don’t think I’ll be heading back to Africa anytime soon — I didn’t fall in love with Kenya, though the people were all very friendly. Next stop will likely be in South America.

Economic woes. You might recall from my last post that I was pretty bearish on the economy. That hasn’t changed, but I don’t sweat it nearly as much as I used to. One of the reasons I was able to stop stressing: I tested my assumptions. I thought there might be some big stock opportunities that I was missing out on (despite my total lack of expertise in the market), so I used UpDown.com to make $1,000,000-worth of paper money investments. I placed my bets and monitored the changes every week or so. After several months, I’d lost 0.9% of the money — about break-even. This was oddly liberating. It shattered the idea that I could take advantage of swings in the market. I don’t have the patience or interest to follow the stock market closely anyways, but it was a good experiment that saved me time, money, and stress. I went back to steady, long-term investing (boring, but far less emotionally draining).

Back to Top

===========
EVENT PLANNING
===========

Opening the Kimono. I developed a much deeper appreciation for great event planners while I was coordinating Tim’s Opening the Kimono event – the $10K/person book-marketing seminar he hosted in Napa Valley. Apart from the actual content, I was given free reign to design the whole conference, from start to finish. Needless to say, I didn’t have much experience in this department so the task seemed fairly daunting. Luckily, my partner during all of this was Susan Dupré – the queen of event planning. Prior to our event, she’d worked directly with Steve Jobs as Apple’s “Worldwide Event and New Product Producer” (she launched the iPhone, for chrissakes!) She’d also worked with James Cameron, Julia Child, and the cast of The Sopranos. After several weeks of preparation, hammering out the broad strokes while accounting for all the minutiae, the event went off without a hitch, and exceeded everyone’s expectations. Susan was largely to thank for that — it was a serious privilege to work alongside her, and I’m now fortunate enough to have her as a close friend… The biggest takeaway from throwing a big seminar: Take at least two trips to check out each venue and restaurant you’re considering, and meet all the people who will be running things. You shouldn’t depend entirely on email, Yelp, Google Maps, etc. for things that need to be seen and experienced. For instance, I nearly booked the seminar at a great hotel — based on Yelp reviews — that was in the middle of an industrial park. This would have been a disaster. Don’t rely too much on the interwebs.

Parties. Before Kimono, I put together a few private parties Tim held. One thing you can take away from them: our party music. All events need a soundtrack to sustain the positive energy, and I spent a fair amount of time putting together a good playlist, which starts off slow and builds up to dance music. Here you go, kids (or get it on Spotify here). And if you’re in search of a good free mix, try Kid Color’s “Palette One” or (of course) Girl Talk’s “All Day.”

Spotify Launch. Sean Parker’s launch party for Spotify will likely be the most amazing and lavish event I’ll ever attend. It was held in an abandoned warehouse that had been fully furnished and redecorated. For food and drinks: a 40-foot sushi bar, two pigs roasting on a spit, a deli-slicer cutting up fresh prosciutto, and an open bar. For live music: The Killers opened, followed by Jane’s Addiction, and Snoop Dogg to close… This was a party for less than 400 people. It. Was. Insane.

Back to Top
=============
RECOMMENDATIONS
=============

Videos: The 1-minute film below, which was commissioned by STA Travel Australia, was the most memorable video I saw last year. The two other videos that Rick Merecki put together from this 11-country trip are beautifully done and worth watching.

And my second favorite video from last year- The speech from The Great Dictator: 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WibmcsEGLKo

Songs:

1. Miike Snow’s “Black and Blue” (Youtube, iTunes).
2. Holy Ghost “I Will Come Back” (Youtube, iTunes)
3. Chromeo “Night by Night” (Youtube, iTunes). I saw Chromeo at the Treasure Island music festival, and this song absolutely destroyed. My new favorite dance song.
4. Black Keys “Gold on the Ceiling” (Youtube, iTunes). Every song on their new album is fantastic — it restored my faith in pop rock.
5. Gotye “Somebody That I Used to Know” (Youtube, iTunes). Beautiful song with a Phil Collins-esque chorus. The music video is classic.
6. Christina Perri “Arms” (Youtube, iTunes). This girl is a fantastic singer; she reminds me of Joni Mitchell. And this song’s build up is flawless for the first 2:40, but the climax gets screwed up with a slow bridge instead of an uptempo instrumental. I’m disappointed and confused every time I hear it — it’s like musical blue balls.

Comedy Albums:

1. David Cross “Bigger and Blackerer” (iTunes). I rarely recommended Cross’ old albums because they were so political. His newest album is great and he keeps the heavy stuff to a minimum. Definitely worth a listen.
2. Patton Oswalt “Finest Hour” (iTunes). One of my favorite bits – The Dumb Gay Friend.

Movies:

With the exception of Bridesmaids (which was genius), I didn’t see anything in theaters last year that I was particularly crazy about. But a few films I finally got around to watching blew me away:

1. Gangs of New York (Amazon, iTunes). Holy mother of god, this movie is awesome. It’s insanely brutal and gory (always fun), but I found myself thinking about it for days — it’s such an interesting part of our country’s history. I think I ended up watching it three times in 48 hours. Daniel Day-Lewis, as always, absolutely dominates the screen. If nothing else, watch this movie to have your notions of “great acting” redefined.
2. Taxi Driver (Amazon, iTunes). Another classic Scorsese, which was more disturbing than any film I’ve seen in recent memory. That might not sound like a positive endorsement, but a film this haunting and memorable is worth seeing. It deserves its place in the top 50 greatest films on imdb.
3. 127 Hours (Amazon). I had the brilliant idea to watch 127 Hours while I was really sick. I do not recommend doing this. I can’t imagine a more difficult story to tackle, so hats off to Boyle for nailing it.

Documentaries:

1. Exit Through the Gift Shop (Amazon, iTunes). Even those who have no familiarity with Bansky or the world of street art will love this film. Fascinating, hilarious, and kind of mind-blowing.
2. 6 Days to Air (Stream). I’m a big fan of Matt Stone and Trey Parker, so finally getting to see their creative process during the making of a South Park episode was amazing. Stone and Parker are two of the most inspiring people in the entertainment industry– they created one of the greatest cartoons of all-time (which has remained both controversial and well-received for 15 years straight), they created two classic blockbuster films, and they dominated Broadway. If you have an ounce of appreciation for their art, watch this documentary.

Books:

Shantaram. This was my favorite book I read last year. I first heard about it from an Australian friend while we were in Argentina (the book has been on the bestseller list in Australia for years). The story is largely based on the author’s life: Gregory Roberts escaped from prison, in broad daylight, two years after he’d received his 19-year sentence. He became Australia’s most-wanted man, and remained a fugitive for the next ten years. The story takes place in Bombay, and Roberts paints a picture of India that’s more vivid, beautiful, and brutal than Slumdog Millionaire. And given the fact that it took the author 13 years to write this book, with two drafts having been destroyed while he was held prisoner in India, it’s a miracle that Shantaram even exists. I strongly suggest that you buy this book, and I’ll leave you with one of the many memorable passages I underlined:

‘The truth is that there are no good men, or bad men… It is the deeds that have goodness or badness in them. There are good deeds, and bad deeds. Men are just men — it is what they do, or refuse to do, that links them to good and evil. The truth is that an instant of real love, in the heart of anyone — the noblest man alive or the most wicked — has the whole purpose and process and meaning of life within the lotus-folds of its passion. The truth is that we are all, every one of us, every atom, every galaxy, and every particle of matter in the universe, moving towards God.’

Television: 

Breaking Bad (Amazon, iTunes). Hands down, the most brilliant TV show I’ve ever seen. The premise: A genius high-school chemistry teacher gets diagnosed with inoperable lung cancer. With only a year left to live, he decides to secretly make and sell crystal meth in order to support his family. There are four seasons (with one more to go), each getting progressively more intense and exciting. The series rivals some of the best books I’ve ever read, in terms of gradual character development and slow-burning plots, and I plowed through all 46 episodes at a frantic pace. But no matter how hard I try to sell you on this show, my endorsement pales in comparison to these guys’:

“Breaking Bad has now surpassed The Sopranos, and, although I love Steve Buscemi, HBO’s Boardwalk Empire isn’t even in the running. Breaking Bad is an American classic.” – Stephen King

“If Hirokazu Koreeda’s right, I hope my afterlife is spent re-experiencing Breaking Bad for the first time, forever.” – Patton Oswalt

“[T]here doesn’t seem to be much debate over what have been the four best television shows of the past 10 years…. The Sopranos, The Wire, Mad Men, and/or Breaking Bad… Of the four shows I’ve mentioned, The Wire absolutely exhibited the finest writing; Mad Men has the most fascinating collection of character types, and The Sopranos was the most fully realized (and, it’s important to note, essentially invented this rarified tier of televised drama). But I’ve slowly come to the conclusion that Breaking Bad is the best of the four, or at least the one I like the most.” – Chuck Klosterman

If you don’t take any of the other recommendations in this post, just watch the first episode of Breaking Bad (free at the link). You’re welcome.

And in other TV news everyone’s heard already, Arrested Development is coming back. God bless Netflix.

Experiments: 

There were two body experiments from last year that are worth sharing: going gluten-free, and trying nootropics. The first was somewhat difficult (so many foods contain gluten), but truly transformative. After 40 days of no gluten, I had more energy than I’d felt since I was a little kid. I felt amazing and was nearly bouncing off the walls. If you have the discipline, I’d suggest giving 4-6 weeks of going gluten-free a shot. You’ll have to give up a lot of delicious stuff (bread, pasta, beer, ice cream, etc.), but you’ll be astonished at how you feel after the first month.

The second experiment was smart drugs. If you haven’t heard of nootropics, you’re not alone — they’re only just beginning to go mainstream. Basically, nootropics are drugs that improve your mental performance: cognition, clarity, recall, etc. I first discovered them while doing research for The 4-Hour Body. After reading a bunch of stuff online to make sure they were safe (here and here were the most useful) and talking to a few friends who had experimented on their own, I decided to give nootropics a shot. By no means am I an expert on this subject (nor am I a physician or nutritionist — before taking any of the below, consult your doctor and do your own research), but for those who are curious, here are a few of my thoughts and suggestions on smart drugs…

• Quality fish oil. It’s good for your brain, your skin, your joints, your overall mood, and there aren’t really any drawbacks. I do 10,000 mg of Carlson salmon oil – 3 pills, 3 times per day.
• Creatine. I was hesitant to take this stuff while I was playing baseball in high school — creatine’s reputation was a little shaky back in the day. Now I take 5 grams every morning. Not only is creatine a safe supplement for increasing muscle mass, it’s also useful for mitigating against neurodegenerative diseases and is even being used to treat Parkinson’s. And it’s super cheap.
• Alpha Brain. This is a solid stack from a reputable vendor. If you want to give nootropics a shot, start with Alpha Brain. I had to take 3 pills at once before I noticed any difference in mental clarity.
• Adderall. Honestly, this stuff sucks. I first tried it with a friend who was studying for her MCAT, and the side effects (not wanting to interact with others, total lack of creativity) outstripped the benefits. Sure, it allowed me to sit down and read non-stop for hours. But it made me feel uninterested in people and not at all myself. Developing artists shouldn’t be allowed to take this stuff.
• Provigil. Also known as Modafinil. This is prescribed to people with narcolepsy. The military also uses it to keep fighter pilots awake during multi-day missions. By far the most powerful nootropic I tried — I actually don’t know if there’s anything stronger than this. My experience with Provigil was ridiculous: I functioned at a high mental level with little fatigue, for nearly four days, on less than 10 hours of sleep. I cannot fully endorse this drug, as my head constantly felt like there was a fair amount of pressure building inside (not a desirable side effect). If you want to learn more, start here, but best of luck finding a non-sketchy online provider.
• Final thought. The promise of smart drugs is exciting, but with the exception of Provigil, I never noticed enough of a difference in my mental output to really justify using these drugs (creatine and fish oil are the only two I continue to take daily). We all want our brains to perform on a higher level, but nootropics didn’t move the needle that much for me, as far as I can tell. But maybe they will for you…

Back to Top

===========
SAN FRANCISCO
===========

Moving. On February 1^st last year, I left Denver and moved to San Francisco. For two months, I stayed at a friend’s house while searching for an apartment in a good neighborhood. This was a bigger hassle than I thought it’d be; decent listings were typically getting 100+ responses in less than 24 hours. Even when I got a response to see an apartment, I often found myself competing with the roommates’ friends for the open room (hint: friends will always win over a random person from Craigslist). Time after time, offers fell through for countless reasons. After weeks of fruitless searching, my dignity and self-worth were replaced with restrained desperation and a frightening willingness to compromise (“I hardly noticed the methadone clinic across the street.”)

After a lot of trial and error, I ended up in a great spot with awesome roommates. And while the hunt for a San Francisco apartment will always be fiercely competitive and fairly miserable, I found several helpful resources along the way that lessened the pain. So here are my pointers for those in their 20′s who are considering a move to SF:

1. To start, use NabeWise.com to get an idea of where you might want to live in the city. Your neighborhood can make or break your willingness to explore, so give yourself an honest assessment of what you want. Neighborhoods I like: The Mission (dirty and riddled with hipsters, yes, but the place has flava), Nob Hill, Duboce Triangle, Castro, North Beach, Lower Pac Heights, Lower Haight. I’m not a huge fan of the Marina or SOMA, though they’re both popular.

2. Spend at least two weeks staying with a friend, or at places on AirBNB.com. Walk all around the neighborhoods you like, taking note of the distance between your desired block and nearby grocery stores, pharmacies, good restaurants, bars, parks, bus routes, BART stations, and other fun neighborhoods. You can also use WalkScore to get an idea of what’s nearby, but it will be better for you to experience it yourself. It’s a pain to have a car out here (parking can be a nightmare, depending on the neighborhood), so plan on walking and commuting a fair amount. Get a Clipper card to save yourself the hassle of paying cash every time you take the bus or train. You might also consider buying a scooter or signing up for Zipcar (I use the latter on a regular basis, it’s a life saver).

3. Once you have a short list of good neighborhoods, use Padmapper.com to find available apartments in your desired areas. As a general rule, you want to be looking at apartments where rent is 1/3, or less, of your monthly income (i.e. If you make $2,500/month, you’ll need to search for listings around $800 per month or less). Flats can be nice, but they’re usually way too small to justify the cost. Unless you’re frighteningly introverted or despise having roommates, it’s better to look at apartments with 3+ bedrooms — you’ll get a lot more bang for your buck. Check Padmapper 2-3 times a day, and immediately email any new listings that look good. Below is a template you can use, which had the best response rate of all the variations I tried. And yes, I know it seems ridiculous for me to offer an apartment email template in this post, but remember — the apartment hunt is absurdly competitive out here. Writing a decent email greatly boosts your chances for getting a meeting and securing a spot. The biggest takeaway: Change your subject line to reveal your age and gender – that’s what matters to most people, and it will improve the odds of your message being opened.

SUBJ: 25-year old male roommate for [Title of listing]

I’m Charlie from Colorado, in search of a nice place in [desired neighborhood] with fun & outgoing roommates. Your apartment looks great, and you all sound like good people. If the room is still available, I’d love to drop in, meet you all, and check the place out.

A bit more about me:

• [1-sentence description of what you do to make money (i.e. show you can pay the bills)]
• [1-sentence description of what you do for fun, or what you have in common with them (i.e. show you’re not a weirdo)]
• [1-sentence about something fun/amusing/memorable that you’ve done or would like to do in San Francisco]
• [Link to Facebook] 

If the above sounds like a good fit, I can come by this week between 3p and 7p. Does Thursday @ 5:30 work for you guys?

Charlie
[Phone number]
[Link to personal website, if any]

4. Follow up ONCE with each listing you haven’t heard from in 48 hours (BCC “2days@nudgemail.com” in the original email to remind yourself). Just send a brief message saying you wanted to ensure that your email didn’t slip through the cracks. They occasionally will, as you’re usually amongst 100+ other emails.

5. Check out the apartments you receive good responses from, and dismiss any that CC you and a dozen other applicants. If you’re going to an open house, you’ll want to arrive early with your credit report, a past pay-stub, and a checkbook (I stopped going to open houses because they’re a collective nightmare). Do not sign anything until you’re confident you love the place, the neighborhood, and the people you’ll be living with. If you’re doing a one-on-one interview with your prospective future roommates, have a mental checklist prepared of what you’re looking for (this article is a solid starting point). On a basic level, you’ll want to know what the landlord is like (strict or laid back), whether the place is furnished (can definitely make your life easier), whether the apartment has a washer/dryer, how good the water pressure is in the shower, whether your roommates smoke, how much total closet space is available, and the length of the lease (I highly suggest going month-to-month in your first apartment). Finally, just relax and be yourself. Don’t give in to people who try to make you feel like they have all the power – they should be happy to meet you, and shouldn’t make you do a song-and-dance to decide whether you’re worthy of living there. Remember: You get to judge these people, too, and can walk away if they don’t seem friendly enough or easy to live with. Most importantly, listen to your gut. If you get even mildly sketched out or feel uneasy about anything, PASS. It’s a hassle to continually search for a place, but it’s far worse to commit to an apartment you don’t feel comfortable in.

Once you’ve found a place and are all settled in, you’ll want to keep an eye on these sites for random fun stuff to do around the city:

• FunCheap
• SF Station
• 7×7

• Pillow Fight Club (February 14)
• Bring Your Own Big Wheel (Easter). Photos I took from this event here.
• Bay to Breakers (End of May). The most fun event in SF, by far. It’s basically a 7-mile block party.
• Gay Pride Festival (End of June)
• Fleet Week (Beginning of October)
• Hardly Strictly (Beginning of October). Free bluegrass festival, subsidized by venture capitalist Warren Hellman.
• Dia de los Muertos (November 2)
• SantaCon / Santarchy (December 10). Thousands of people dress up as Santa Claus all around the city.

Back in February, I was invited to speak at Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh for their TEDx event. I accepted for a few reasons: (1) I’d been interested in seeing how well my written content would translate to video; (2) it would be delivered in a room of 400 attendees, which would be the most people I’d ever spoken in front of; (3) it would be a fun challenge — I hadn’t done any real public speaking, which I genuinely enjoy, for more than three years; (4) it’s TED. Tough to say no to those guys.

After checking out the lineup of speakers (which included the inventor of CAPTCHA, a human rights activist in Zimbabwe, and a doctor who discovers and cures extremely rare diseases), I quickly gained some perspective on how incredible my contribution to humanity has been. And by “incredible,” I mean “trivial.” Don’t get me wrong — I’m proud of the things I’ve worked on; I just felt like a tee-baller who’d been asked to suit up for varsity. I mean, I wrote an e-book… That about sums it up.

So I decided that, instead of trying to sound smart, I should focus on being relatable. Just like a politician. [Sidenote: I wish I didn't have to say this, but I have NEVER referred to myself as a "marketing genius." Ever. I did not suggest that title.]

This strategy resulted in a speech that has lowered the bar for every future TEDx speaker. For instance…

Here are six phrases that (until now) you’ve never heard in a TED/TEDx speech, and will probably never hear again:

1. “Scary as shit”
2. “Douchebags wearing Ed Hardy shirts snatch up all the hotties”
3. “Blog, blog, blog, dorky stuff, whatever”
4. “Charlie Hoehn equals drunk abortion”
5. “Bite me in the ass”
6. “Protestors are funny”

In spite of all this, the speech has been well-received (thanks to this writeup on Lifehacker). And while my presentation was far from perfect — I get it, I pace around too much — it was still significantly better than when I first started rehearsing. I know this because I filmed and reviewed all of my practice runs.

For your amusement, I have compiled a two minute clip with some of the outtakes:

As you can see, I was still doing re-writes in my hotel room in Pittsburgh. I submitted my final presentation at about 2am, the day of the event.

A few other speeches at TEDxCMU were particularly memorable for me. To start: two friends of mine, Jenny Blake and Amber Rae, both spoke at this event. Their speeches were equally impressive for different reasons:

1. Jenny’s keynote kept flicking off the screen the entire time she was presenting. It was ridiculously distracting for everyone in the audience, and even worse for her. Luckily, she had practiced a bunch without the use of her keynote, so she was able to successfully get through her whole speech without much help from a visual aid. She was also able to slide in some impromptu jokes about the whole situation that set everyone at ease. She wrote about her experience here (you can watch her speech here).
2. Amber never practiced her goddamn speech. Not once. Not only that, it was her first time giving a speech to a big audience! This blew my mind, as she delivered it almost flawlessly (watch it here). I am incapable of this, and so are most other people. Do not try to pull off what she did. PRACTICE.

My favorite speech from the event came from Luis Von Ahn, the inventor of CAPTCHA. He discussed how he was able to turn this necessary-evil into something positive: a way to crowd-source the digitization of books. He also talked about his next project, DuoLingo, which will make language learning free and easily accessible for everyone. Really cool stuff, and definitely worth checking out. His speech can be watched here.

Overall, it was a really fun event and I’m very glad I went. The team of people who put everything together — James Pan, Todd Medema, Mia Wang, Matt Katase, Brian Rangell, Bin Yang, Heidi Yang, Jeesoo Sohn — all did a fantastic job. Thanks again, guys.

And I continue to enjoy my sweet parting gift:

More photos from the event here.

====================
What I left out of my speech
====================

Near the end of my presentation, I said:

“And now there’s some bad news. America is in a tough time, and it’s going to get tougher. Honestly, we have to pay for our sins at some point. We can’t keep this up. And the economy is going to get worse. Jobs are going to be cut, jobs are going to be eliminated, jobs are going to be outsourced. It is a tough market for us.”

I originally planned on discussing this point at length, but ultimately decided to stick with a brief uplifting conclusion. In any case, here’s what I have to say about that…

In August of 2005, I was sitting on the carpet floor of my new apartment in Fort Collins, assembling my desk. I was entering my sophomore year of college, and was euphoric with the idea of creating three more years worth of fun memories with my friends. While I was putting in one of the screws, a quick thought randomly flashed into my mind: “You are going to die.” It seems funny typing it out now, but at the time, it truly shook me. Something I had known intuitively for 19 years had finally stuck, and it wouldn’t stop echoing through my head. Ironically, this moment of realizing my mortality while doing something so trivial is still far more vivid in my mind than so many of the great memories I made over those next three years. For the first time in my life, I understood that my years were limited, and everything would eventually come to an end.

A few months ago, I went through the same experience. Only this time, the thought was “America is going to collapse.” It was a notion I’d been reading about for years and one that I thought I’d come to grips with. Not the case. When that idea was fully realized, I had a tough time sleeping for weeks.

We are in a huge mess. To say “America is in a tough time, and it’s going to get tougher” is a severe understatement. The truth of the matter is this: our country is in for a very major kick in the teeth that’s going to last for decades. I am not an economist by any stretch of the imagination, but anyone with a pulse can take a passing glance at the numbers and see that this fairy tale ride we’ve been on for the last 40 years is coming to an end. The recession of 2008 was merely a sign of bigger things to come.

I don’t know what’s going to happen. No one does. Globalization, the Federal Reserve, our banking system, etc. have all made things so ridiculously complex and intertwined that it’s impossible to say how the next few years will pan out. But I do believe we are witnessing the fall of this country, and a lot of what Americans know and hold dear is going to fundamentally change or evaporate. Our expectations for what our futures hold will eventually derail, and it will suck.

This is scary, depressing stuff. I know. It’s especially scary because the economy is not something you have any control over; you can only mitigate against potential risks. I wish I had answers for every graduate about to enter the work force. I don’t. There is no easy answer for all of this. The only advice I can sincerely offer is: read more books, and get off the path if you hate it, especially if you know it’s leading you nowhere.

But… there is good news, for all of you. I did mean what I said in my speech: As long as there are problems that need to be solved, there will always be work. And while the number of cushy no-value jobs will start to rapidly diminish (adios, social media experts!), the concept of doing real work will not.

You don’t have to know what you want to do for the rest of your life, but you do need to start working towards something. Free work is an easy way to start building a skill set that not only matters to you, but one that can actually deliver value to others. It is not about doling yourself out as a slave; it’s about offering help in exchange for priceless hands-on experience. Free work is a credo for advanced learning, and it’s one that I intend to practice for the rest of my life…

The way I put an end to my sleepless nights was quite simple, and it’s something I’ve continually returned to over the years. It alleviated my “You’re going to die” fixation, and it pulled me out of my “America is going to collapse” funk:

It’s just a ride.

###

Two final things… First, I did an hour long interview with Lewis Howes awhile back (full write-up at the link). It turned out well, so many thanks to Lewis for putting this together. And if you’ve ever dreamt of listening to me indulge myself for 57 minutes straight, you are in for a treat:

Second: My good friend, Jeff Waldman (who makes fun of me for only getting invited to speak at TEDx once — he’s been invited twice), recently spent a weekend hanging up 50 swings around the city of Los Angeles. He did this simply to inject a little spontaneous joy into people’s lives. The video he made about his experience is great (with over 190,000 views in less than two days) and it’s worth watching:

Jeff is currently raising money on Kickstarter for his next project: Swings in Bolivia. If you want to see more of this type of thing in the world, throw some money their way (even $5 helps). I’ve been friends with Jeff for about two years, and if there’s one thing I know about him, it’s this: the dude delivers. He will make this Bolivian swing project into something very cool. So check it out and help his cause.

###

To all my readers: Thank you again for the continued support. I don’t know what originally brought you here, but I hope you’ve enjoyed it.

If my guest post on Tim’s blog brought you here, I have some other fun articles you’ll enjoy:

• Recession-Proof Graduate – My free 30-page guide on how to get your dream job. It’s been read by more than 60,000 people.
• Thoughts on Tour – My most popular post. I discuss failure, and why I’ve chosen such a sporadic career path.
• Interview with Wisepreneur.com – A recent interview I did, published about a week ago.
• The easiest way to change your life – I elaborate on an underrated concept from The 4-Hour Workweek.

And if you like Tim’s writing, you might want to subscribe to my blog because I helped him put The 4-Hour Body together. I also work with the guy full-time, so I’ll occasionally impart some of the stuff I’m learning on this site.

Final note: I’m in Austin for SXSW.  It’s my first time here, so if you have any suggestions on cool panels to attend between now and March 15, let me know in the comments.

I’m still in shock.  The 4-Hour Body is the #1 New York Times bestseller, in the hardest category, at the most difficult time of year.

This was our Mount Everest, and we reached the peak.

I’m super proud of Tim, who’s been working on this forever and nearly killed himself in the process.  I’m extremely grateful that he allowed me to not only tag along during the last year and a half, but actually have free reign to make mistakes and learn during the making of a 600-page book.  Thank you again.  It truly was a dream job for me.

I’m not going to lie, this book was legitimately difficult to make.  I remember calling Ryan last year, as he’d worked with Robert Greene on one of his books, just to see what I was getting myself into.  I remember him saying that it consumed his life, but my experience might be different.  Nope.  He pretty much nailed it.  But as Ryan also noted, how often will you get to have another opportunity like this?

This project has made 2010 very special and memorable for me.  It unexpectedly helped both of my parents lose more than 25 pounds each, and regain their figures from their early 20′s.  It completely eliminated my back pain that’s bothered me since high school (I have spondylosis, scoliosis, and degenerative discs).  It made me a more energetic and happier person.  It opened countless doors for me, and allowed me to meet some amazing people.  But most of all, it’s been the type of project I’ve wanted to work on since the day I graduated.  In these last 20 months, it’s reinforced everything I believe in: work on stuff that matters to you, do something that will add value and help people, and try to disrupt the status quo and make things better for everyone.  This book hit on all cylinders.

There’s a lot more to come from me on just this one topic alone (some of which you’ll eventually see on Tim’s blog), but for now, all I have to say is…

Thanks for reading, Merry Christmas, and here’s to an even bigger 2011!

[Note: This post is a monster.  If you'd rather print it out, you can download the PDF.]

Two months ago, I relocated to Buenos Aires. I’d been wanting to take a break from the States for a long time, had met my travel budgetary goal months prior, and all of my work could be done remotely. The stage was set. I bought a RT ticket to depart on September 15th, with a December 12th return date. But… I actually ended up writing this post from Denver and San Francisco, as I had to come back six weeks early for the upcoming book launch. Some of this stuff just needs to be done from within the U.S.

While I came back quite a bit earlier than anticipated, I still returned with six weeks-worth of cultural observations and fun stories.  This post contains the experiences that I think you all will find to be the most entertaining.  There are no marketing musings to be found here; just a self-indulgent post with some fun travel tales.

And Brazilian girls. Lots of Brazilian girls.

Enjoy.

========================
10 Random Observations from B.A.
========================

(1)  If you’re trying to practice Spanish, a lot of Argentines will notice your accent / poor pronunciation and start speaking back to you in their broken English. They think they’re doing you a favor by speaking in your native language, but they’re actually handicapping your ability to learn. Ironically, it’s your English that actually gets worse as a result of these interactions, as you’re constantly having to dumb it down so it makes sense to them. The best way to counter this, which I discovered way too late, is to reply back in rapid, slang-riddled English. Kind of like the jive conversation in Airplane! Basically, you need to confuse them so they revert back to Spanish out of necessity. Then you can proceed.

(2)  You can order delivery from damn near every restaurant in BA (aside from the high end ones). Even Burger King delivers. A cool site you can use to get food delivered to your door is Buenos Aires Delivery.  It’s a fantastic service for English and Spanish speakers that’s run by its gringo creators in BA.

(3)  Need to get around the city but don’t want to keep paying for cab rides? Use this map, which will tell you all the different public transportation routes you can take to get from A to B.  This map is actually better than Google Maps, for Buenos Aires anyways.

(4)  I checked out a bunch of backpacker hostels around the city, and only a couple are worth mentioning:  (a) If you’re young, single, and wanting to meet fun people your age, go to Milhouse on Hipolito Yrigoyen. Constant partying (literally every night), plenty of good people, and lots of cute girls. There’s another Milhouse on Avenida de Mayo but it’s not as good.  (b) If you need a nice hostel that’s quiet and will help you relax, check out Portal del Sur just down the street. Gorgeous place that feels like a home. (Thanks to Maneesh for the recommendation).

(5)  If you’re looking to rent an apartment, get one in Palermo Hollywood or Palermo Soho. Lots of awesome restaurants nearby and really fun nightlife. I do not recommend getting a place in Congreso, as you will get very bored very quickly. Recoleta is pretty nice, but it’s for an older crowd with more money. There are other parts of the city that are legit, but I think Palermo is the best bang for your buck.  Use this site to find flats with roommates, or this site to find apartments if you want to live alone.  This site also has great prices, but appears to only work when you’re in Argentina.

(6)  Two touristy restaurants that are worth it: La Cabrera in Palermo, and El Desnivel in San Telmo. Order any of the enormous steaks at the former, and get bife de lomo pimienta at the latter.  Great steaks for $12 to $20.

(7)  On a related note: if you’re a vegetarian, do not go to Buenos Aires. You will fail. There’s fantastic beef everywhere you go – literally some of the best cuts in the world – and very few restaurants have decent vegetables. A Peruvian friend of mine was a vegan before going to BA, and she quit after a week and a half of eating house salads. I’m not a vegetarian, but having access to quality vegetables was one of the things I was looking most forward to upon returning to the States. There was one week where I went to four different restaurants and ordered a side of espinaca (spinach) from each of their menus. On all four occasions, the waiter would return to the table minutes later, and say they didn’t have spinach. This was not a coincidence. Vegetables just aren’t as commonly served. Expect to eat plenty of bread and meat.

(8)  Nightclubs: I’m a firm believer that you can always have fun, even if a place is terrible, if you’re with good company. You can also have a terrible time, even at the best place in the world, if you’re with a lame group of people. You shouldn’t worry as much about where you’re going, but rather who you’re with and whether they’re on the same energy plane as you. Having said that, the nightlife in Buenos Aires is pretty sweet. Even though I never go to clubs in the States, there are a couple clubs that are worth checking out (and a few you should avoid):

-  Crobar = Recommended. I had a blast every time I went there. It’s a huge place, the music is fun, there are tons of people, and it’s an overall good vibe.

- Asia de Cuba = Worth seeing once. A really nice club set on a river, but it’s pretty small and they charge crack prices for drinks. More of an upscale crowd, which isn’t really my thing, meng.

- Pacha = NOT recommended. This is apparently a very famous club all around the world. Well, the one in BA sucks. The music is intolerably trance-y, there are tons of guys wearing sunglasses, and it’s a dude-fest. Skip.

- Jet = I heard so many great things that I have to mention it. Right down the street from Pacha, Jet is supposedly awesome. I didn’t get a chance to check it out, but all of my friends gave it the unanimous thumbs up.

- Servino = Imagine only listening to bass music – not drums, just bass – for two hours straight. Pretty awful, right? Now surround yourself with 80 people who are dancing to it on acid.

(9)  This next observation is worth mentioning because it’s a hilariously accurate stereotype: Every young Australian guy I met who was traveling through South America either knew where to get cocaine, was currently holding, or was doing it on the reg. All of them raved about the book “Marching Powder” and planned on visiting the infamous prison in Bolivia, where guards give you a tour of the jail and allow you to purchase cocaine from one of the prisoners. Now, I’m not saying that all Aussie guys are rabid cokeheads. In fact, the majority of them were a lot of fun to drink with and very cool people. But it was clear that doing coke was a big priority for them while they were in South America.

(10)  My favorite thing about Argentina, and I suppose South America in general, is how affectionate people are towards each other. You don’t shake hands – you embrace and give a quick peck on the cheek. You don’t hide Public Displays of Affection – they’re completely acceptable. I dig this, and feel that it’s a much healthier vibe. Generally speaking, I think the US is a pretty sexually repressed country. South Americans do not hesitate to touch or kiss each other, and they lack any feeling of awkwardness about it.

=============
Ah, Brazilian girls
=============

You know how your money goes further in some countries? Well, so does your ability to attract the opposite sex. I knew this intuitively, but had never actually experienced it. Prior to Argentina, my only true international experience had been four months studying abroad in New Zealand. While I’d had a great time there, I never met a Kiwi girl that I’d want to bring home to introduce to my family and friends.

The dynamic was completely different in Buenos Aires, where I met tons of girls from all over South America: Peru, Colombia, Paraguay, Argentina, and my personal favorite… Brazil. I’m only going to talk about the latter, as I spent significantly more time with them than all the others.

The first thing you should know about Brazilian girls is that they are very quick to jump down your throat. I’ve seen guys walk up to them and be passionately making out within 30 seconds of meeting, to the extent that it looks like they’re going to rip each other’s clothes off right in front of you. This is not an exaggeration.

I say this wearily now, almost jaded by the fact. But there was a brief period when I could barely comprehend it. Here’s how I first made the discovery:

About a week after arriving in Buenos Aires, I went to Crobar with two Brazilian girls I’d met earlier that night. We were walking through the crowd towards the bar, when I noticed a random Argentine girl making eye contact with me from about 10 feet away. Because I’m a weirdo, I always have to lock eye contact with people who do this to me until they look down (submission, baby!) But as I walked past, this girl did not break. She just kept staring. Filled with shame for having been bested by a Porteña, I broke eye contact and continued to walk with my Brazilian amigas (normally I would have stopped and talked to the girl, but my Spanish was nonexistent). One of the Brazilian girls turned back to me:

Her: “She liked you.”

Me: “I think so. That was kind of intense.”

Her: “You should have walked up and kissed her.”

Me: “… Uhh, I think you’re forgetting that I don’t speak Spanish.”

Her: “That does not matter.”

Me: “… As much as I enjoy the taste of pepper spray, I’m pretty sure I’d need to lead up a bit before kissing a complete stranger.”

Her: [Confused look, shrug]

We stepped up to the bar, got in line, and another random Brazilian girl walked up to us a minute later. What followed was our EXACT interaction, verbatim:

Random: “Hola! De donde eres?”

Me: “Soy de Colorado.”

Random: “Ah, Colorado!” [Smile, lunge to make out]

Apparently, that’s all the lead up you need.

It was the first time I had experienced this social norm of making-out-before-talking. I was so taken aback by it that I couldn’t help but start laughing after a few seconds. Naturally, the girl swiftly ran off, as she thought I was laughing at her.

When I asked my Brazilian guy friend the next day what the deal was, he explained it as such: “Why would they want to make small talk in a club? There’s plenty of time for that later on… It’s not uncommon in Brazil to kiss five girls in one night.”

Brilliant. The Brazilian girls operated with the American guys’ mentality! I remember thinking that if Neil Strauss had grown up in Brazil, his best-selling book “The Game” would have never been written. This theory crystallized in my brain as “fact” later that week…

I had just met two very cute Brazilian girls in a loud bar. When presented with similar situations in the States, I’d often speak with the less attractive of the two first, while making the other girl wait. It’s a strange counter-intuitive step in the dance, but it helps more often than not. So after a minute or so of this, I went to talk to the other Brazilian. She introduced herself, then said, “You like my friend?” I shrugged, and said “Sure,” thinking she was just making polite conversation.  Her response: “You need to kiss her then.” I leaned back with a confused look. She nodded assuredly and gestured for me to make the move. Lesson: There’s not as much need for strategically sequenced conversations or all the other mind-gaming nonsense with Brazilian girls. If you see a girl you like, be direct and go for it.

This “Cut to the chase” mentality was not reserved to the girls; Brazilian guys were just as bad, if not worse, in many instances. This one time, I’d been sitting in the hostel lobby working on my computer, when a Brazilian guy approached a couple of blond Aussie girls. Immediately after introducing himself, he pleaded them to kiss each other. I found this amusing, as he made no segue into the request. He also said it with a fairly serious delivery, clearly expecting them to comply. When they resisted, he purposefully moved in to kiss the taller one. She turned him down as he was reaching to grab her face. He tried and failed two more times, then finally accepted defeat. I looked down at my cell phone. It was 1:00pm.  Good lord.

Witnessing this aggressive behavior from Brazilians was pretty great, but what made it so much fun were three other ingredients, the first being a well-known stereotype. (1) Brazilian girls are, in many cases, extremely good-looking. My attraction to nearly all of them ranged between “Aww she’s adorable” to “Stunning… gorgeous… most attractive girl I’ve ever seen.” (2) They’re really sweet and friendly. This was what made it lethal for me; a beautiful girl who’s also genuinely sweet is my Achille’s heel. In the six weeks I was down there, I never had an interaction with a Brazilian girl where I thought, “Man, she’s kind of a bitch” (comparatively speaking, there were plenty of Argentine, Aussie, American and English girls who repeatedly triggered that judgment). Perhaps I was wearing rose-colored lenses around Brazilians, but they were all (even the guys) very warm, happy, and fun to be around. (3) Brazilian girls REALLY like guys with non-brown eyes and non-black hair. Having green eyes has never helped me in the States. Ever. It’s just not a big deal – they’re common. But for Brazilians, green and blue eyes are very rare, and therefore remarkable.

[Note from my friend Colin at expat-chronicles.com:  "I learned what a novelty my blue eyes were in Latin America soon after arriving in Peru. I was having lunch with a few university girls and the conversation switched to my eyes. The girls talked about and analyzed my blue eyes for a full few minutes. One said she "loved" the color and the way they blink. I'm a moderately handsome guy, so such attention was something new for me.

After getting accustomed to it, it's no longer surprising when strangers comment on them in the street. Old women, young women, all kinds of women compliment my blue eyes. One woman smiled and said "escaparon del cielo." They escaped from the sky (or heaven depending on the translator)."]

The beauty of this equation can’t be fully appreciated until you compare it with home.

Now, Colorado girls are very down-to-earth and genuinely good people, and I say this with 100% sincerity. I don’t dislike them at all. It’s just very rare to come across a girl in my home state whom I have a strong primal attraction towards. There aren’t a whole lot of them, and the scarcity can be exhausting.

Compared with Brazilians: high concentration of stunning girls with warm/friendly personalities, and when there was a mutual attraction, they were frequently the aggressors. To top it off, they never once held it against me for showing affection early, as they often did it themselves without batting an eye.  This was an immensely refreshing change.

So, America or Brazil… Tough choice, but for now, my vote lies with Brazil.

=================
Leaving the candy store
=================

If it’s not painfully obvious by now, I fell in lust with a lot of the girls I met in Buenos Aires.  Yet there were two in particular that stood out, with whom I felt a stronger connection with.  I don’t say this very often, but I could have pictured myself dating either one.

The first is worth mentioning because she was so gorgeous that other guys in the hostel, whom she’d never met, were approaching her with flowers and gifts. She was a lethal combo: beautiful, really affectionate, and not clingy.  She also taught me that Brazilian girls flip the hell out if you give them a playful slap on their ass in public. It’s a big no-no if you put a hand on that area, even briefly, when you’re around other people.  Strange, but consider yourself warned.

The second girl was a very intelligent, sweet, and passionate architecture student, who was obsessed with Jack Kerouac and raved about the quality of American literature. She was easily in my top 3 favorite people I met. I still talk with her regularly, and she recently sent me what’s probably one of the best messages I’ll ever receive: “Num deserto de almas também desertas, uma alma especial reconhece de imediato a outra” (“In a desert of empty souls, a special soul immediately recognizes another.”)

=========
DISCLAIMER
=========

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention what you’re getting into with Brazil.  Almost every American I spoke with about Brazil, including people who grew up there, said something to this effect: “Brazil is f-ing dangerous.  If you look the way you do (light hair, green eyes) and clearly don’t speak Portuguese, you are a sitting duck.”  A friend of mine told me he had 3-4 near death experiences while he was there.  Another said his family was robbed a minimum of six times per year growing up, a la gun to the face. But then again, I’ve heard several others say things like “I backpacked there for 12 weeks and didn’t have any problems.”  Obviously, people have varying degrees of luck during their travels, but based on everything I’ve heard, planning a trip to Rio is not something to take lightly.

I’ve never been to Brazil, of course, but I’d imagine there’s a lot of truth to this statement: “You can either have expensive and safe, or cheap and dangerous.”

==========
Tran-spotting
==========

Argentina was not all rainbows and kittens for me. I had countless failures with females, including a disastrous 3-hour blind date with a psychotic Porteña, among others. But one particular incident is burned into my memory…

One day, a New Yorker checked in to the hostel I was staying in. He was a good guy who wanted to experience the infamous nightlife and cut loose from the drudgery of his Wall Street job. When we went to the club, he brought along a Brazilian girl whom he’d met earlier that night. As he was dancing with her, I looked across the room and saw an incomprehensibly stunning Argentine girl, dressed in very provocative clothing. The most beautiful girl I’d seen in months was a mere 40 feet away, talking and drinking with her girl friend. I walked over, took note of her fake breasts, said ‘hola’ to them (the girls, not the breasts), and the three of us started dancing together. I danced close to her, we exchanged seductive looks with one another, and I quickly became intoxicated by her beauty.

Ten minutes later, I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around to see ol’ New York, grinning from ear-to-ear, with the Brazilian under his arm. “She’s got something to tell you, bud.” I looked to the Brazilian, who leaned towards me and nervously mumbled a line I’ll never forget:

“I don’t know how to say… Not all girls are girls.”

It took about 10 seconds for me to register what she was implying. New York cracked up as the look on my face shifted from confusion to pure terror.

I didn’t have the sense of humor or presence of mind to calmly turn around and give her the Dundee test.  So in a drunken haze, I made a mad dash for the exit. If I couldn’t tell guys from girls – nay, if I was actively trying to seduce transsexuals – it was time to call it a night. I went back to the hostel, took a cold shower, then lay awake for an hour, wondering how “This chick might be a dude” never once crossed my mind. What an amazingly convincing surgery.

Thankfully, I did not kiss her/him, but I got close enough to do psychological damage.

==========
The open-mic
==========

I stayed in Milhouse hostel for a while, which typically had about 150-200 residents, ages 18 to 27, on any given night. Every Sunday, they’d have a “jam session” where a local band would come in and play from 11pm to 1am. Everyone would sit around, drink a few beers, and listen to the band before going out to the clubs. It was pretty fun, and they allowed anyone to get up and play.

I’ve been playing guitar for about four years now, but I’d never played in front of strangers. Guitar has always been something I did by myself, for my own amusement. So on jam night, I had no intention of performing… until I heard the Indian.

He ran up and grabbed the guitar, sat down with a smile, then looked around and realized how big the group actually was. You could see his confidence drain within seconds. He was so nervous and awkward when he started playing that people had to restrain their laughter. I felt kind of bad for the guy, but even more than that, I felt a need to destroy him. No matter how poorly I played, I would sound ten times better than I actually was if I immediately followed his embarrassing performance. So, courtesy of impulsivity, alcohol, and a sweaty Indian kid, I found myself playing and singing Tom Petty’s “Running Down a Dream” in front of 60 drunken travelers.

When the song was over, I barely had a chance to blink before the band’s lead singer ran up to me: “Keep playing man, but you have to sing into the mic. You’re too far away. Sing right into it.” Ah. No wonder I couldn’t hear my own voice. “You’re also strumming WAY too hard. The guitar is amped, so everyone can hear you fine. Strum quieter, sing louder.” Got it.

The next song I played was an abridged version of Don McLean’s “American Pie.” The abridgement was to spare the crowd’s ears: I needed to cut 8-minutes of singing time down to 4-minutes.

Now, I know I’m not a good singer. Nor am I a very good guitar player. And I’m not saying this with a false sense of modesty; I am very mediocre by American standards. But there I was in Argentina, completely taken aback by the response I was receiving. The crowd clapped and sang along, and then applauded in such a way that made me think, “Wow, maybe I could pursue this down here.” Of course, I have no plans to pursue music seriously at any point, but the experience I had was a blast (and a fantastic adrenaline rush).  It would not surprise me at all if I found myself at another open-mic in the near future.

================
What I’d do differently
================

I did very little in the way of preparing myself for those six weeks in Buenos Aires. I also didn’t really make plans for anything that was more than 48 hours away once I was down there. This was a fun experiment, but it also lead to some problems. Here’s what I’m going to do differently for the next time I go down to South America:

(1)  Clear my work schedule. I knew going down that it wasn’t going to be a vacation, where I could take days off to explore the countryside. I had plenty of work to do. But after a few weeks, it was tough to hear about all these multi-day adventures other travelers were going on. Granted, if I hadn’t been hanging out with people who were traveling around, it wouldn’t have seemed like such a big issue.  But next time, I definitely want to explore.  I’ll be sure to clear the slate and take a brief hiatus from computers.

(2)  Learn Spanish. Being monolingual has been one of my single greatest sources of embarrassment over the last several years. This feeling is only magnified around my Dutch friends, who tend to speak a minimum of five languages. I met a 17-year old girl who spoke eight languages, and I quote: “But two of them really don’t count because they’re dead languages.” Almost everyone speaks a bit of English, which was both convenient and frustrating. I wanted to practice my Spanish in BA, so before I left, I bought Michel Thomas’ 8-hour audio course. This helped TREMENDOUSLY when I first arrived, as I was able to communicate what I needed 95% of the time. But being able to speak Spanish was not as useful as comprehending people’s responses, which I found to be very difficult, if not impossible. My lack of listening comprehension was, without a doubt, my biggest source of frustration/anxiety. It truly sucked. However, there were a couple things I found that helped a lot, and I would focus much more on practicing them next time. The first was watching movies and TV shows I loved, like Los Simpson (The Simpsons), in Spanish. Los Simpson in particular was great. It’s always entertaining, the characters speak relatively slow, and you can usually figure out what they’re saying. The second thing was staying the hell away from people who spoke English fluently. I remember having to buy a cell phone, and feeling like I was going to pass out from exhaustion. It was a half hour conversation in Español – not a single word of English – and I understood maybe 10% of what was being said to me. But I walked away having learned several new words and phrases, and felt more motivated than ever to learn the language. That motivation easily got buried again once I found myself among English speakers. Next time, I’m keeping my distance from Aussies, Brits, Dutch, etc. and sticking more with the locals.

(3) Couchsurfing. I’d planned on doing this, but didn’t end up getting around to it. I decided to rent an apartment instead, which allowed me to regain focus on work. But I would have loved to meet a bunch more Argentines. I plan on hosting and going to meet ups when I move at the beginning of next year.  Why not, right?  You get to make friends with people from around the world, all for free!

============
Lessons learned
============

Short-term travel is both a tease and a fantasy. You meet amazing people, hope to reconnect at some point and go on more adventures together, but you both know deep down that you might never see each other again. In a way, that’s heartbreaking. When I meet people I really enjoy, I want to keep them in my life and bring them closer. That’s extremely difficult to do when you’re traveling. You know that your return to the real world is inevitable, and that usually means saying goodbye for a long, long time. It’s quite sad to meet someone, get emotionally attached, and have to part ways indefinitely after a few days. But it’s mind-numbingly exhausting when you have to do it a half dozen times in a week.

Of course, that’s not to say that it isn’t worth it. Travel is the only time where you can meet tons of folks who are completely relaxed and open-minded, and you frequently come across individuals whose love for life and people just pours out of them. These are my favorite types of travelers, because they fill you with energy and happiness, and effortlessly bring out the best in others. I don’t know why it’s so rare to encounter this type of person back home. Perhaps it’s because all travelers share a mutual thrill for experiencing something new together (everything around them is exciting!)  They also seem less prone to being judgmental, simply because everyone around them is in a perpetual state of analysis and they’re all learning about each other. If someone does something strange, you tend to dismiss it more readily (“Maybe that’s normal where they’re from”).

Whatever the case, the random people you meet is what makes travel worthwhile. If you’re anti-social, traveling will bring out your inner extrovert.

What you also notice after awhile is that travelers – whether they like it or not – are ambassadors for their cities, states, and countries. Your interactions with others will almost always shape what they think of “your people.” This became very clear to a friend of mine while he was traveling around Asia. He noticed that people in North Vietnam looked down on Americans for many reasons, but were particularly unforgiving because they had never had any American friends when they were growing up. Many of the people in South Vietnam, however, had developed close relationships with Americans more than 30 years prior. The memories of their old friends remained fresh, and their attitudes towards Americans were passed along to their children. This cycle, if strong enough, can facilitate an entire culture’s hatred or adoration for foreigners. So do your duty as an American, and don’t be a douchebag overseas.

==========
Final thought
==========

No matter how safe you think your city is, there are people in this world who are too scared to visit it.  The media heavily colors our opinions of other countries, coupled with the extreme stories we hear from our friends and relatives.  Of course, we usually only hear about (and remember) the crazy bad stuff. It’s not fair, but that’s the way it works.

Remember to emphasize the positive and encourage people to travel, so they won’t be so damn paranoid.

To my handful of real life friends who read this whole post: let’s start planning our Brazilian adventure.

###

The book I’ve been helping with for nearly two years is available for pre-order. It’s already hit #1 on Amazon’s Health and Fitness category and #1 overall on Barnes & Noble.  You’ll be hearing a lot more about it in the coming weeks.

UPDATE: There’s a fun post on Brazilian models that Tim put up on Thanksgiving.  There are two quick things I want to mention: the introduction, and the response.

The intro Tim wrote is a funnier (and more concise) story than how I actually discovered Jeremiah.  Here’s what happened… One night in Buenos Aires, I met an Australian guy at a restaurant who had been living in Brazil for three years with his girlfriend.  I told him how much I wanted to visit, and he said, “The first place you have to go to is Florianopolis.  I’m going to give you my email address so you can thank me when you’re there.”  The next day, I searched for ‘Florianopolis’ on Flickr.  I looked at pictures of the beaches, which were nice (but not quite as beautiful as Thailand’s).  In the bottom-right corner, I saw related images of girls in swimsuits.  Naturally, I clicked through to check them out.  The beauty of the girls was no big surprise, but I was genuinely impressed with the quality of the photos.  Under each one was a paragraph outlining Jeremiah’s story — a regular guy with a camera who decided to pursue his dream of becoming a swimsuit photographer in Brazil.  Very cool.  After returning to the States, I went to work at Tim’s house and mentioned how I’d stumbled across a great 4HWW story.  We both thought it would make a cool blog post, and that was that.  Not quite as humorous as me ogling Brazilian chicks at 2am when I should have been working (seriously, who uses Flickr to search for pictures of hot girls?), but so it goes.

The response to the post has been fairly predictable.  98% of the readers love it, and 2% are completely disgusted.  This was both expected and intended.  I’ve read all the comments, and have seen the word ‘misogyny’ thrown out a few times.  While this is amusing to me, as it’s clearly a gross misunderstanding of the word, I would like to come to Jeremiah’s defense.  I’ve spoken with the guy, and he has nothing but love and respect for Brazilian people and the girls he works with.  If you missed this, then you brought your own interpretation to the table before you even read what he had to say.